I would write up a full blog, with all the hilarious anecdotes, but A) it would take too long and B) I'm pretty sure it would violate some non-disclosure agreements. But I will give you some highlights!

• Someone (Sarah) decided to not clean out their bag before we went through airport security. So of course, there was a pink Swiss Army knife in her bag. Cut to Sarah grumbling, looking irritated, and mailing her knife back to herself while writing her name on a government watch list. Nice.
• Another same someone forgetting their ID to get into a 21+ party, and having to take a taxi cab ride of shame back to the hotel to get a drivers license.
• Eating bacon on the balcony of a posh Italian hotel. The bacon was fantastic.
• Meeting all of the people I'd only ever spoken to over the phone. Turns out I work with young, beautiful people. Bizarre.
• Eating panini in an Italian bistro with Sarah while discuss psychoanalysis.

The rest of my highlights can best be conveyed by these awful photos that I took. Exciting! It's like a slide show that you can ignore and pretend to have watched!

This was my swanky Italian mod hotel room. The bed was really uncomfortable, but there was a fantastic chair that was perfect for reading in. I almost finished Mr. E's autobiography in that chair.

The party we went to the first night was held in this really swanky night club. They closed off an entire city block, and Cheap Trick played outside while people danced inside. It was pretty cool. I have an awful video I took from my phone of Cheap Trick performing; unfortunately, the quality is pretty crappy, so I don't think I'm going to upload it. I mean, it's nice to get a sense of scale and the moment, but it's painful to watch. I've learned my lesson there.

That same block party also had a creepy person dressed up as a butterfly dancing around to the music. The giant butterfly danced to 'Tainted Love' with me; I think DJ has a picture of that floating around somewhere.

Our second party, the next night, was also held in the same place. This time, it was a sexy mermaid party, which meant that there were scantily clad mermaids dancing inside cages (you can see one there), as well as bubbles in the air. This one was delightfully risque, and quickly turned into a dance party. Some fat dude danced behind me in a creepy way at one point while Sarah and I were dancing with one of my reps. It was pretty sweet. Wait, who was all there?

Partner in crime Sarah, of course, the lovely Mr. and Mrs. Parker, and of course, this guy. I tried to get a picture of Tim, but he was relatively elusive. I do have a picture of him sitting next to the cage dancing go-go girl smiling, but I've elected not to post that one. It was kind of a weird party that way.

The third party was on top of an aircraft carrier, the USS Midway. There's pictures of me in WW2 fighter plane cockpits, and other exciting stuff, but I don't have those yet. Instead, accept this picture of a fighter. Yay!

Oh, I'm sorry, did I forget to mention it was also a Beach Boys concert on that aircraft carrier? Yes, this was as awesome as it sounds. I never knew that I had always wanted to go to a concert on an aircraft carrier, but now that I have, I have no idea how I survived this long without having done it. It was amazing, eating BBQ between WW2 aircraft and listening to surf music. I also have a video of this, but it's the same as the other -- interesting to me, not to anybody else. Que sera, sera.

Oh, and then they launched fireworks off the aircraft carrier. YESSSS.

All in all, it was pretty awesome. I only talked about the fun stuff, but we got a lot of work done too (I just can't really talk about that, I think).

So, what I'm saying it, awesome!

[UPDATE: Oh, also, Tim just called me. We won 'Best In Show'. We rule.]

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