I love it when you can hang someone by their own words.

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The action will die down for a minute, but make sure you're watching to the very end.

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As reported here and here first, it looks like Moffat is either A) fantastic at predicting the future or B) in direct contact with The Doctor, who is real. I'm hoping it's more of the latter than the former.

Personally, I'm glad I have my Sonic Screwdriver on my desk. Never hurts to be prepared.

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It occurs to me that the reason I might be heavy-set is because I dream about food at night.

Actually, that's not entirely true. I haven't ever dreamed about food before, but I did last night. And it was kinda weird.

In my dream, Utah had become a bizarre police state. Armored vehicles prowled the roads looking for normal people to beat up or arrest or something. My subconscious wasn't clear on that, exactly.

I was at home, getting ready to cook dinner, when I realized I was out of ingredients.I was making what Dream Austin called 'Premium Macaroni and Cheese', which I don't think I've ever had, based on my dream-time recipe (which I'll list below).

So I hopped into my car, Road Warrior style, and started taking back streets to try and get to the grocery store. I narrowly avoided a police convoy on 39th and snuck behind the grocery store. Unfortunately, there was an armed guard in a tower protecting the back, but I was able to sneak behind him and break his neck (?!?!) before he could radio for help.

I entered the grocery store armed with my list of things that I needed in order to make the mythical 'Premium Macaroni and Cheese'. The list is as follows:

- Noodles
- Cheddar cheese
- Gruyere cheese
- Bleu cheese
- Smoked pepper bacon
- Bread crumbs

My plan was apparently to make mac the regular way, but then use the fancy cheeses, and put some pan-fried bacon crumbled up into the mix. I'd then top it with bread crumbs, and bake the whole thing for a few minutes to get it a little crispy. I have no idea how that would actually taste, but in my dream, this was a very important recipe.

Anyway, plan didn't go so well -- turns out your local grocery store doesn't just stock gruyere off-hand (who would have thought?!) and I got stuck at the bakery while trying to purchase a large frosted cookie with an offensive saying written on it. I don't remember if I was captured or not.

I guess what I'm getting at is, that was weird.

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Let's get even more jazzed about Scott Pilgrim. Also, I wish this was longer.

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So it's official -- I'm bringin' it back.

Inspired by the great Matt Smith, I've decided that I have a round enough, childish enough face to pull off the bow tie and have it look charming-ish and a little playful. This will be a full fashionable assault, utilizing all the most powerful weapons in the style catalogue -- slacks, tasteful blazers, vests, the works. Besides, I'm a creative in a creative field; it's nigh upon my duty to be kinda weird.

So I'm takin' it back. I'm taking back the bow tie from the style equivalent of the loser intellectual. It's on like Donkey Kong.

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I want to be best friends with this guy.

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I guess you really are only as old as you feel. And these people are wonderful.

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If possible, read that last panel, and then click the 'Instant CSI' button over there. -->

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- So, back at work. Feeling better? Not quite, but hey, I probably won't die.

- The bathroom flooding situation is sorta under control. There's a story behind that, but I'm much too tired to write it out. So let's just say that it involves buying a water heater while running a fever and coughing up phlegm. It'd probably be funny if it wasn't so sad. But hey, tragedy + time = comedy, so maybe one day it'll turn into a wacky party story.

- Why are we listening to 'All Night Long'? It was in my head when I woke up this morning. Don't know why.

- I think I've become a bad movie viewer (not a viewer of bad movies, which I've already been, but someone who is bad at watching movies). I'm reaching a point where I start to watch a movie, get twenty minutes in, and then turn it off to do something else. I've now cannibalized like four movies that way in the last few days. I'm wondering if it's because I'm feeling sick, or my attention span is going to crap, or what.

- Of those movies that I never finished, I did get really far into 'Tears Of The Black Tiger'. It's a Thai western film, and it's very visually striking. I want to say that it's like a western movie from somebody who has only the loosest sense of western archetypes, but I don't think that's apt. It is pretty cool, though. Maybe I'll finish it.

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Just a good old fashioned late night Saturday/early Sunday update.

So this weekend's sorta sucked to the max. I woke up this morning to a fun sight -- the water heater broke! And my downstairs bathroom was flooded!

My downstairs bathroom has wooden floor, and now it squished when you step across it. Water bubbles up from the cracks. But that's half the fun; the other half is going to buy a new water heater, and replace it. Oh, and, my throat hurts, and I'm pretty sure I'm getting sick.

Tell you what, when it rains, it pours.

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Some of you may be familiar with my erstwhile business, The Mustache Emporium. It was a grand idea whose time almost came, and then never did (mainly because I've been moving around like a crazy person for the last year or so).

So a couple months ago, I received a letter from the state telling me I needed to file taxes for the business. That's an easy one, I thought; I never made a sale (and instead ended up giving away a whole bunch of my stock) and didn't ever do anything business-y with it. So I replied to their form letter, let them know my business had been long closed, and that we never even made a sale. And all was well in the animal kingdom.

Until yesterday.

I got home yesterday evening nursing a semi-painful headache. But the headache was just beginning, unfortunately. Turns out the government doesn't believe me. Not only do they not think that I shut down the business (you guys can check, the website's even gone), but they've gone ahead and estimated my business's worth, and how much I should owe them in back taxes.

According to the State of Utah, The Mustache Emporium, a business that I literally ran out of my bedroom and a single drawer in my desk, made something like $112,000 last year.

Uhhhh huh.

Further, they're pretty sure that since I didn't pay taxes on that imaginary money that never existed, and I should probably cut them a check for $15k.

UHHH HUH.

So I now get to enjoy a potentially long and protracted battle with the state to prove that, yes, I once operated a business selling imported novelty mustaches, but no, I never made any money, and I sure as hell didn't make $112k last year. Believe you me, if I did, this blog would be much better looking and I'd own like a ton more wicked awesome stuff and wouldn't have student loans or anything.

I guess what I'm saying here is, look before you leap. Or, rather, don't apply for a business license if you're going to unforseeably close your business within a few months having made no money. The state will flip their shit over that.

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So I'm currently in the middle of my third Tuesday.

The last few days, my sleep has been erratic. Long-time blog readers know that this isn't really anything to write home about; my sleep fluctuates between fantastic and fulfilling, and utterly bizarre. Recently, however, I've been adding a new element to the mix:

I keep fake waking up.

Let me give you a typical scenario. Sunday night, I go to bed at 11 PM in preparation for a big day the next day. I close my eyes, and immediately wake up. It's 7:30 AM, and I've gotta get to work! I take a shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, all that jazz. And I drive to work. I work for a couple hours, and then it's lunchtime. Maybe I go out to eat with Scott, or I have a coffee lunch or something.

I jolt. I'm back in bed, and my alarm clock has just gone off. It's Monday morning at 7:30 AM.

At this point, if we're counting dream hours, I'm working 60 hour work weeks. Happened to me Sunday night, where I made it until about 2 PM before I realized I was dreaming. And it happened to me again last night, but with a more dastardly twist.

I fell sleep, woke up, did my morning thing, and went to work. Made it until lunch time, and then woke up. Oh Austin, how wacky you are. So I got up for real this time, did my morning stuff, went to work, made it to lunch... and woke up again. For really real this time.

The second one is the one that freaked me out a little. I was pretty dang sure that I was awake that time, which means that I've entered into a bizarre Matrix-type situation, where I now am not completely confident that I'm actually awake. I'm writing a blog now, and reading it on the screen, which is something I normally can't do. Dream Austin doesn't read words well; he gets a fuzzy feeling as to the content of the page, but not the specifics. I can see specifics here, so I'm about 99% sure I'm awake.

But what if I'm not? What if I'm not a butterfly dreaming of being a man, or a man dreaming of being a butterfly, but a man dreaming of being a man perpetually dreaming about going to work(1)? What's up my psyche(2)? Am I going crazy(3)?

(1) Probably.

(2) I need to take more vacations.

(3) Already there.

(4) All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy all

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We're pretty big 'Man v. Food' fans around this house. So this morning, when Mom was gonna make pancakes, we decided to step it up a little and make DeLuca pancakes.

Official item list:
(1) Pancake, dinner-plate sized
(15) Chocolate chips, regular sized
(3) Squirts of Chocolate Syrup, crossing the pancake
(1) Scoop of Vanilla Ice Cream
(1) Squirt of Whipped Cream, applied generously

Side note, this pancake is delicious.

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That Duke girl is in a heap of trouble leaving the airport drunk...

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Eeeeeeeee! *does girly excited hand gesture*

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